Valentine’s wishes to Julian Ruck

The monkeys want to know if you’ll be their Valentine, Julian. Oh, do say you will. It would make them so happy. They swear blind that they’ve put all thoughts of dog shit behind them (in a manner of speaking).

They were particularly delighted to see in the comments on a previous post that PR 4 Books, who seem to be Julian’s go-to team for self-promotion, say:

Blogs and other forms of digital marketing have created a great means of communicating with your audience, allowing you to engage, interact and connect with your readers, creating likeability for you and your book. In order to make serious sales, you also require credibility; this comes from being featured in national newspapers and magazines, speaking on National Radio and having your book reviewed by trusted people.

The monkeys want to congratulate PR 4 Books on having done such a particularly good job on the ‘creating likeability’ front. Julian Ruck is clearly now one of the most widely liked Welsh figures on the internet, and it’s probably mostly thanks to PR 4 Books that the monkeys are so keen for Julian to be their Valentine.

And as for those of you who didn’t go to Julian’s talk – you fools! It was marvellous. It made the Kidwelly-e festival look like a raging success. Julian is sure to tell us all about it in the very near future – he’ll probably be too modest to admit it, but his words of advice will almost certainly have inspired ‘some village Hampden’ or perhaps even a ‘mute inglorious Milton’. This, O Arts Council, THIS is how to birth a new Welsh Shakespeare, not your frivolous funding!



Filed under The Society for the Preservation of Commas

6 responses to “Valentine’s wishes to Julian Ruck

  1. thelatteliterati

    Jewels, sweet Jewels, there are no comments on your jewels here. You haven’t been deleting critical posts by Julian and his acolytes, have you?

  2. Puppy

    Maybe Julian is attempting to create sympathy rather than likability? Sympathy for his lack of intelligence, skill, writing ability, inability to use commas… The list goes on

  3. I think he might be playing hard to get. The monkeys are living in hope.

  4. Mrs Penn-Thomas

    Dear Monkeys

    Forget any romantic attachment you may have to Julian. He will lead you on and then dump you. In forty years time he will be posting on-line the love poems he wrote especially for you. Or worse, you will be married to him and your conjugal disharmony and bodily dysfunctions will be a source for his ‘jokes’. It will sting to find another – but you deserve more.

    yours sympathetically
    Mrs Penn-Thomas

  5. No monkeys. he will break you with his midnight flatulence!

  6. Shekh rabbani

    Hi John, may be you are right. But i am not sure.

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